Fruits and Ham
by Tricksterr
Summary: There's a thin line between love and hate, but a far line between fruit and ham. And Freddie wishes he didn't know about it. SEDDIE :D Review!
1. A platter of ham

**A/N Here we go, a new story!! ICarly, baby! lysapot's story, 20 Random words inspired me. Chapter 5. Freddie's PoV. **** I'm taking creative licenses, and saying they're 17…… **

_I always knew that when I become an adult I would be Carly Shay's second husband. If you ask what happen to the first one, well let's just say, it's something you can never prove! Setting that aside, me and Mrs. Carly Shay-Benson would have three kids, two girls and a boy, and when the kids finish college, we will retire in a little beach house in Hawaii, each day watching the sunset sharing a bowl of fruit._

_But now I'm so confuse because whenever I try to close my eyes and imagine that future again, it was a little different._

_I could still see watching the sunset but instead of fruits, it was ham, and it wasn't with Carly, but it was with Sam._

**-From the story-**

**-Actual story is continued from the end of the ex****cerpt, above-**

Today instead of staring at the future Mrs. Benson I kept looking over to Sam. Everything about her was annoying. The way her huge blue eyes seemed to lighten the whole room, the way her hair looked like a gold halo around her sweet face, the way her lips were a sweet shade of pink……

………Come to think of it, those could be considered _good _things. No wait! Bad thoughts Freddie!

"Yo! Benson! See, told ya Carls, he's brainless!" Sam's voice suddenly rings. I sigh disgustedly.

"I resent that, Puckett!" I shout already knowing what would come.

"I resent you." Sam yelled, and _stuck a piece of fruit up my nose! _I suddenly remembered my weird freaky screwed up dream. The fruit felt like sweet acid in my nostril. I felt my eyes begin to burn a bit.

"Aww, is Fweddie-boy gonna cwy?" Sam asked with a pout. Around her lips a small smirk was playing in a way only Sam could do.

"Well, guys let's go-uh-eat food!" Carly not so smoothly cut in. She stepped between us. Her coal black hair was slightly frazzled. Her dark eyes were worried. I tried to decide quickly who could keep a man's attention better, based on looks.

No matter what I do, Sam wins.

She can't _lose _anything, can she?

"Food? Why are we still here?" Sam asked perking up. I swear this girl can be bipolar sometimes.

I heard Carly release a sigh of relief. I didn't see her though; I only had eyes for Sam Puckett.

What was I going to do, when everything she did was having me want to strangle her then kiss her?

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We sat in the booths of some cheap food joint. It was hot sticky and vinyl-y. But it smelled like Heaven down on Earth. Carly and Sam sat across from me, talking about Build-a-Bra.

"May I take your orders?" A friendly girl with a sweet southern accent said. She was hot, with a light dusting of freckles across her button nose. Her red hair was pleasantly frizzy, and her teeth were straight and white. There was nothing wrong with her.

So why wasn't she as pretty as Sam?

"Yes. Can we have two plates of your hamburger surprise and a platter of ham? Thanks." Carly ordered for us. Politely! And sweetly with a nice smile.

That's right when it hit me. Like a load of 5 ton bricks. Aimed at the head, and thrown by Sam.

_I didn't like Carly!_

"No." I said suddenly. I shook my head. "Can I have the…..ham?" They always were my favorite. Not as if I would tell you, so you can tell Sam! Ha! I'm not that stupid.

"But….you always order the same as Carly!" Sam said, as Carly just sat there.

"So?" I shrugged. I felt sort of like I just jumped of a cliff head-first, relying on Sam catching me.

Do you know how _stupid _that is?

"You're copying my order!" Sam spat, with her eyes narrowing. I swear, if she was a cat she'd be hissing.

"I can eat if I want to!" I shouted. Something told me Sam was gonna win this one. What a shocker. I bit my lip.

"Not if I'm eating it!" Sam yelled, equally as tense.

Carly looked at the waiter. "Sorry, uh," she squinted at the waitress's nametag, "Lily. This might take a while….."

"No, I can wait!" she said, flashing us her dimples.

"Why is all about you, Puckett?" I said, standing up. The salt fell over. Sam narrowed her eyes.

"You better toss some of that over her shoulder, Benson," she said in a tone so deadly I wouldn't be shocked if she pulled out a gun and spat tobacco. She stood up as well.

Normally I wouldn't, but there was something in her smooth voice that made me do it. I shot her a dirty look that was well reciprocated. A look accompanied by a very rude gesture.

"Are they normally like this?" I heard Lily whisper to Carly.

"No. They're being civil…" Carly muttered. Lily seemed to be our age so Carly asked, "haven't you seen them around school?"

"I have, but I thought it was an act..." Lily said, with a small frown etching her smooth face.

"Don't you dare say anything, Carly…" Sam said in a deathly tone. If looks could kill, then poor Carly would be dead.

"I want ham! Is that a federal crime now?!" I shouted, referring to the previous argument.

"Yes! Carly didn't order ham for herself, and you love Carly!" Sam shouted so loudly, several heads turned.

I heard several whispers of: 'A lover's quarrel?' 'They're so sweet together, and 'they could shut up-oooo a lover's fight!'

"I don't like Carly anymore!" I yelled, relishing in the freedom of those words. The only problem? I think I'm in love with Sam.

And she so totally planned this….

"Really?! And Hell is a freakin' ice cube!" Sam yelled, along with a snort.

"I'd rather be in Hell then be near you!" I yelled, contradicting everything I now felt.

"I think they dig each other…." I heard Lily whisper to Carly. She nodded, quickly.

Sam looked over to her coldly, staring daggers. I felt myself glare at her as well.

Lily put her hands up in a surrendering motion and said, "Just saying……."

We all sat back down (well those who were standing up) and sipped our sodas carefully. The silence lasted for nearly half an hour after Lily brought the food.

I kept thinking about Sam, though. I realized why I 'hated' her. I hated the feelings I felt to her. I loved _her _though. My little dream of being Carly's second husband faded away and was replaced by Sam and me, only each other, our first and only.

Suddenly a pretty fat guy stood up and yelled loudly, "I won! I won! I'm rich, baby!" He held up a lottery card, and everyone screamed loudly. People shot up like rockets to see him.

In all the chaos and disarray I yelled, hoping no one would hear me, "I love Sam Puckett!"

No one turned.

Except for Sam. Her eyes pierced mine, and her lips were parted slightly.

Crap.

**A/N Should I leave it there, or continue it?**

**:D!!!! Please review!**


	2. A kiss

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A/N I was so overwhelmed by your awesome reviews, that I got straight to work on this chapter! Still Freddie's PoV

She's staring at me right now. I have the feeling most people get right before they're brutally murdered.

I wish it would be that painless.

By now everyone was crowded around the fat dude…no one noticed Sam and me, still standing around the table.

"You _what?_" she asked, with her eyes practically spelling out her feeling.

I really should run.

"I….love you," I said feebly. She walked over to me, ignoring the madhouse surrounding us. Lily and Carly were gone, only us.

She walked up to me and placed her hand on my cheek. I held it there.

"Are you sure?" she asked me. I decided to opt for the truth. Hey, I wanted to live.

"No," I said, cause I wasn't. I was confused.

She removed her hand and walked away in the most un-Samish way ever. She suddenly turned and slapped me clear cross the face.

"You're an ass," she said as I held my cheek. I stared at her wordlessly. She ran out of the diner in a huff, visibly angered. I prayed Gibby wouldn't be in her way.

Carly walked over to me, and said after quickly looking around, "Where'd Sam go?"

The space where she had been felt cold and empty. Sam was the reason my world spun around. The realization was, again, like Sam throwing 5 ton bricks at my head.

"I dunno," I said, waiting for Carly to ask why I looked like I was about to sprint.

"What are you gonna do……?" Carly finally asks. I grinned a lunatic's grin, and waved at her.

"I'm gonna go after the girl I love!" I shouted. I heard the place cheer, and nobody was around the fat dude anymore, they were around me in that cheesy way bad romantic comedies do.

"What does that have to do with Sam?" Carly asked, scrunching up her tiny nose. I laughed.

"Sam _is _the girl I love!" I exclaimed, loving the way the words rolled over my tongue. Carly gasped, and another loud round of cheers filled the diner, as I ran to catch up with Sam.

"Sam! Sam?" I shouted. I looked over in the direction of where she'd run, and was greeted by emptiness.

"Aw, man!" I shouted. The streets were cold and foreboding on the left of me, and warm sunny and bright on my right.

I ran to the left.

"Sam?! SAM!" I yelled, praying to God that she wasn't going to murder me.

The ground was wet and slippery from an unnoticed rain. The sky was still gray, and Sam was till no where in sight. The only comfort during this whole mess was knowing that Gibby was one of the people in the diner, and wasn't in Sam's way.

The thing about Sam is she doesn't get mad. She gets even. And I really got her pissed. This could be really, really bad. It doesn't do well for the pride when you're murdered by the girl of your dreams.

"Freddie, dude, what are you doing? Are you running from Sam?" I suddenly heard. I turned around and saw Jake and Jonah, looking ready to go in the defensive pose.

"No, I'm looking for her!" I said, waiting for their reactions.

Jake placed a hand on my forehead. "Are you sick?" he asked.

"Forget sick! Are you _stupid?_" Jonah asked.

"I don't know. I just know I'm in love. And that could result in my death." I answered, pushing Jake back a little bit.

"In love with who?" Jake asked.

"Sam. Sam, I'm in love with!" I said, not even listening to myself.

"Then why are still here?" Jonah asked.

I just slapped my forehead, and started sprinting. "It's your funeral!" I heard Jake call.

He's right, he's right! It's my funeral. But I kept running, nothing was gonna stop me.

As I ran, I heard a radio blast form a passing car.

_I love you! _

_I hate you!_

_I can't get around you!_

I instantly registered the song as Always, by Saliva. I never really got it. I mean how can you love someone, then hate them. And it isn't impossible to get over a crush—okay, yeah it is, but that still doesn't make sense.

Now it does. Like hell it does.

"Fredward!" I hear someone call. It's one of two people. Since I'm uninjured and safe currently, I'm guessing it's:

"Hey, mom!" I said, painfully. I waved at her feebly. She raised an eyebrow.

"What are you doing?" she asked. She peered at me from out of her car.

"Going after Sam…." I said waiting for the shouts.

"Why?" she asked simply, with no panic attacks or _anything! _

"I love her, mom." I simply said. Hey, it's now or never.

"Finally!" she exclaimed. "Spencer owes me $10!" she added.

"You….were……placing…..bets?" I asked slowly.

She nodded a little.

I knew I had stopped going after Sam for to long. I waved, and ran, knowing I was close.

"Freddie, are you wearing clean underpants?!" I heard call. I ignored her.

I finally got to the park where Sam and I used to play when we were little. She was sitting on a swing, listening to her pearpod.

"Sam?" I asked, settling down next to her.

"Freddie?" she asked.

"Yeah?"

"Push me!"

I laughed and began to push her, and she started laughing too. We spread the sound through the air.

"I lied, y'know," I said after a while. She turned to me. We were currently lying next to each other, on the soft sweet smelling grass. It was a sharp scent, slightly warning, just like Sam.

Her ocean-blue eyes pierced through my dark ones. I took a deep breath, inhaling her scent.

"'Bout what?" she asked, lazily drawing circles in the grass.

"I do love you." I said, taking the fatal plunge.

"Took ya long enough."

"What?"

"I mean, I know _I _love _you_. And it's kinda obvious you were confused. So I was waiting. Please, if I didn't know, I would have done a lot worse back at the diner," she said, flashing me a brilliant grin. I kicked myself for forgetting she wasn't book smart, but she sure was street-smart.

"So…..you're my girlfriend?" I asked, knowing the answer.

"Yep, I am. Now you have to get me ham all the time and never complain. So there," she laughed. The fiery sun's pale rays hit her face making her look like an angel.

So I did the only natural thing.

I kissed her.

"Wow. Looks like you can kiss," Sam muttered. Her soft hand intertwined in mine, and her blue eyes rested on my brown.

"Hah. What happened to not for $9 million?" I asked.

She laughed. The sweet music of the air played.

So we did the only natural thing.

We kissed.

A kiss full of promise, meaning, love, and preparation for the heated arguments that will never go away.

Or……it was a kiss. Just a kiss.

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